I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Holy sore nipples Batman
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Randomize
