dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
