Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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