Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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