he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
