Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
