let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
