what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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