I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
