ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
