My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Randomize
