A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Randomize
