quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
