i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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