Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
