Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
