Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
