But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Randomize
