yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
