Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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