This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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