He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
