So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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