remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
