I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
