Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
