He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
