people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
