dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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