Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I just saw a hot homeless man
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
