end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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