Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
