Please, let me fuck your mom
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
