We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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