What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
