This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
