I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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