did you get engaged???
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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