dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
