Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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