Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
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