So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
