I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
