when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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