so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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