She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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