I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Can you bring me the toilet please
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
