chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
