Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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