If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
